I thought I’d get everyone in the mood for Hallowe’en by posting my picks for top five scariest movies of all times. Most of them should be available at Blockbuster, Hollywood Video, and Netflicks. Got one not on this list? Drop it in the comment box.

1. The Birds (1960)

This classic thriller from Alfred Hitchcock is my personal favorite. Glamorous actresses Tippy Hedren and Suzanne Pleshette star with hunkola Rod Taylor. It’s scary because it takes an ordinary everyday subject (birds) and, much the way Stephen King does years later with a dog, turns it into something to be feared.

2. Nosferatu the Vampyre (1979)

This is Werner Herzog’s remake of Max Schreck’s 1922 classic, Nosferatu, and Klaus Kinski is an excellent vampire. If you haven’t seen the 1922 version, you should do so. It would make you appreciate this one that much more. You might also enjoy Shadow of the Vampire, starring Willem Dafoe (it’s not a remake of Nosferatu, but rather a film about the making of the movie).

3. The Blair Witch Project (1999)

We rented this movie when it became available on DVD. As it turns out, Robert had to go out of town that weekend and I ended up watching it alone. Suffice it to say that there were times during the movie that I was watching it from the damn doorway, scared to look at the screen at times. The fact that it was shot in 16mm black and white, in documentary format, lent it a realism that made it all the more frightening. As an aside, the production company, Haxan, is a silent nod to the Ultimate Best Horror Movie of All Time, Haxan. If you can ever get your hands on a copy of this irreverent film, please grab it, it would be a rare gem.

4. Rosemary’s Baby (1968)

This film works, not only because of the genius of director Roman Polanski, but because the acting of all the principals, especially Mia Farrow, just works. It’s a film of ultimate betrayal and while you will have figured out the movie’s ending halfway through, you must watch helplessly as Rosemary comes to terms with the fact that the man she loves has sold her soul to the devil. Charles Grodin has a small part (his first) as Rosemary’s gynecologist.

5. Repulsion (1965)

This Roman Polanski film predates Rosemary’s Baby by three years. It’s a dark and brooding film, and the horror lies in the slow descent into madness that the film’s protagonist, played by Catherine Deneuve, takes when she’s left alone for several weeks in the apartment she shares with her sister. Introverted, she’s soon courted by a handsome man. But what happens during the course of that courtship … well, I won’t tell you. Rent the movie.

You can hardly tell the difference with Volkswagen’s new series of Routan ads featuring Brooke Shields. While it’s presented in a tongue-in-cheek fashion, that doesn’t make it any less repugnant to me. Maybe they did that simply because they knew darn good and well that was the only way they’d get it past a lot of folks. I’m no feminist by a long stretch, but the message this ad is sending sets women back tens of thousands of years to when they were being dragged by their hair into caves to breed children. Women have been struggling for the past 40-odd years for some equality and they’ve been once again reduced to sperm receptacles and human basinettes in the span of a 30-second sound bite.

Second of all, there are enough unwanted pregnancies and unwanted children in this world and to send a message to young women that it’s “okay” to procreate simply to upgrade your vehicle or drive a “cool” (by WHOSE standards?) minivan is asinine. I’m childfree by choice and if I never drive a gas-guzzling SUV or minvan as long as I live, it will be too soon. If VW thought this was the antidote to the “soccer mom” label, they were sadly mistaken.

It makes me wonder about the safety and value of the vehicle itself. Nothing’s mentioned about this German engineering women are impregnating themselves to acquire. Sounds like much do about nothing if you ask me. All I can say is, “Thanks, Volkswagen, but no thanks. I’ll keep my Honda, my sanity and my diaphragm.”

And it isn’t that Volkswagen and Madison Avenue can’t come up with something irreverent to tout its latest automotive creation. Behold:

Bored? Don’t know what to do with yourself at this late (or early) hour? Tired of the Wootoff crap offerings? How about a nice challenging game of Find the Joni (and name the imposters)?

Drop your answers here or in the FlickR comments!

My friend and I happened upon this accident on our way out to dinner last night, we were just yards from the restaurant parking lot at the intersection of I-45 South and Woodridge when this accident happened. And it happened between 8:45 and 9PM last night, not 10:30PM as all the reports are saying. (I in fact Twittered it at 10:06PM, after I’d been at the restaurant for a good while.)

Of course, when we got to the restaurant, we told our friends about the drama unfolding nearby.  There were some expressions of surprise, but for the most part, as my friend observed in an email to me about it this morning, “life went on as if the incident were surreal.”  That man whose lifeless body we saw on the blood soaked pavement meant something to someone, I can only hope. Today, someone is wracked with grief over his loss.  Reminds me of an old Civil War poem:

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I learned from watching Dynasty!

I love your desk. The tusks – they are so you.

I think this is another one of your incredible performances.

Sweet and vicious, an unusual combination of talents.

Listen to me, you little tramp.

I am leaving… but I shall return.

I didn’t thank you for your present.

Thank you Alexis and Krystle. Where would I be without your collective wisdom?